Seriously, how stupid can you be to think at 18 you really have what it takes to impress an older man into giving you thousands of dollars when you haven’t even impressed a 21 year old into paying for dinner?
My feelings exactly….
Men who are attracted to naivety and innocence are deeply sick.
A true sugar daddy wants an intellectual and emotional equal, and no matter what experiences you have had the simple fact is that your brain just isn’t developed fully until around 23-24 for most folks. A man who gets a kick out of a girl who cannot keep up intellectually is power-hungry and will likely be condescending. He has deeper issues he needs to work on, and the situation lends itself to a power imbalance that will probably end poorly.
Sex work, like any profession, requires more than one ever imagines before going in. Sex work is not a summer job at an ice cream shop or a retail gig at a chain- it requires the same maturity and experience as a professional career. This is not to be condescending but rather to put things in perspective. One would not be properly equipped to practice medicine, for example, before developing both technical and emotional skill sets. We need to stop this idea that sex work is any less difficult and any less mentally trying than other types of work.
Please stay safe, both physically and emotionally, and remember that the latter is equally important as the former.
You may feel on top of the world but trust me- this will change. I’ve had affairs w a professor of mine, a physician of mine, several married men, etc., and men who seek out that sort of thing tend to be the ones to victimize girls. When I was 18 and a professor showed me that attention I thought I was on top of the world, but years later I realize how damaging it truly was. This is not merely an anecdotal example but rather an illustration of relationships with inherent power differences. Again, a man who does not want an equal is a sick man.
The girls who fall for this, however, are not stupid. They are victims. Yes, they should do their research of course, but it is also up to us to ensure they truly understand the nature of the work and not just the glitz and glamour.
As a side note, if you are offended by what was originally said, became defensive or felt affronted, then you are not ready for this work. If you felt threatened by the idea that you may not know it all or that you may not be ready, then you are not ready.
You develop as much between 18 and 25 as you did between 11 and 18. Keep things in perspective. Be humble. Acknowledge you do not know everything and be willing to self examine very deeply. Be willing to admit when wrong. Again, if you immediately feel defensive, then you are not ready.
Yep. J loves that I can keep a conversation and that I’m pursuing graduate school. I’ve also had a lot of real, hand on experience with various populations which just adds to my maturity level.
I cannot fathom having done this at 18. Good gawd I was mess then!
By no means am I perfect now, but shit, I was at such a different state then.